


Together

by Sinnykins



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Established Relationship, Kissing, M/M, Romantic Fluff, Social Anxiety, excessive handholding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 19:35:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13577526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sinnykins/pseuds/Sinnykins
Summary: Whenever Kaneki feels lost, Hide is always there for him; when he questions himself, when he doubts himself, when he's afraid, he's always able to count on the one who has been at his side since the beginning. Sometimes Kaneki's affections are a bit more subtle than Hide's, but he still appreciates Hide more than anything -- and Hide certainly enjoys being appreciated.





	Together

**Author's Note:**

> oh hey I guess I'm not dead and also still love hidekane? yeah real life kinda sucks and stuff but I have more time lately so I procrastinated to write this!
> 
> what is This, you might ask? Self indulgent hidekane fluff basically. I didn't think too much about this in terms of where it is in the series timeline or much context at all to be honest, but it's established relationship because I wanted to write them being cute together. I guess you could imagine that they went on a date or something? idk I like it a lot when they Kiss.
> 
> let me know what you think and feel free to leave suggestions in a comment or come send me a request on my twitter! thank you so much for reading and please enjoy uwu

Had there been this many people before?

 

Kaneki stood rooted to the spot outside of the little bookstore he'd just finished browsing, a paper bag clutched close to his chest. The streets were brimming with bodies packed so tightly they had to shuffle by like a sluggish river carving its way past muddy banks. He took a step back, involuntarily, and held his purchase tighter as if to protect it from the crowd.

 

There certainly hadn't been. He would have noticed it.

 

"Must be rush hour," the casual comment from beside him caused him to startle, and he looked at Hide a bit sheepishly. Kaneki had forgotten that Hide had accompanied him today in that moment of shock.

 

"...Ah, yes, I suppose so..." he replied softly, his gaze wandering back into the mass of people. Something sour clawed its way up his throat, and he fought to swallow it back down.

 

"Hey, I'm super parched after thumbing through all those stuffy books -- let's go get some coffee!" Hide declared after another moment of pause.

 

Of course his hesitation did not go unnoticed. Guilt began to seep its way past the nervous energy, and Kaneki reminded himself that he was being silly, and he should inconvenience Hide like this. With little more than a nod in response, he abruptly pushed his way into the sea of bodies, and the crowd hit him like a blast of icy water. It ripped the breath from his lungs, the smells and sounds of people like an oppressive force constricting around him. Someone impatiently brushed past him, bumping his shoulder, and Kaneki's knees felt weak as he stumbled into another person's back.

 

If they noticed or cared, he couldn't tell. He was being swept up in the flow of the crowd -- was this the direction they wanted to go? Kaneki tried glancing desperately over his shoulder, trying to confirm if Hide was still with him, but all he could see were irritable strangers trying to push him along. The peripherals of his vision hazed over, clouding, tunneling down to a single point as he struggled simply to remain upright. Crushed between bodies, Kaneki's lungs burned with the effort to pull in more air, but they were weakened by the weight of a hundred people pressing in close.

 

Just as he squeezed his eyes shut a hand grabbed his arm.

 

"Kaneki--!"

 

A voice, muffled at first by cotton in his ears, began to break through his panic. He jerked his head around and was greeted by a messy head of blond hair, big brown eyes warm and full of concern as they studied his face.

 

"Kaneki, you're like a man on a mission. I almost lost you there."

 

It was gradual, but his ears seemed to clear out and his vision corrected itself; the drowning feeling, all the pressure against him, began to fade.

 

"Hide..." Embarrassment bloomed across his face, hot shame flushing through his cheeks at the way his voice shook. He glanced away, and was surprised to see people simply flowing around them with a complete lack of interest.

 

"It really is crowded..." Hide was acting like he didn't notice how shaken Kaneki appeared to be, and yet the hold he had on Kaneki's arm remained firm. "Do you mind if I hold onto you? I'm worried I'll get lost otherwise." With his other hand, Hide rubbed the back of his head sheepishly and shot Kaneki a lopsided grin.

 

In an instant, everything was replaced with a rush of gratitude. Kaneki's chest ached, and he promptly blamed it on guilt -- that Hide had to do something like this for him made him feel terrible. And yet...the relief was immense. Was he even a little happy?   

 

"Sorry..." Although Hide had been the one to ask, Kaneki took the initiative in sliding his hand into Hide's, who didn't hesitate to hold it in return.

 

"What're you apologizing for?" The smile that spread across Hide's face was so soft that, for a moment, Kaneki felt he couldn't breathe again. Without an answer, he simply looked away as he fought against the new batch of butterflies tickling the insides of his stomach. Hide's hand gave his a gentle squeeze. "Come on, we're almost there."

 

This time it was Hide that began walking first, the grip he had on Kaneki's hand keeping him close as they reintegrated into the stream of bodies. A jolt of that oppressive fear struck through the bubbly feeling in his chest, threatening to suffocate him once again, but he focused intently on the feeling of Hide's palm against his own. It was warm, soft...the strength of his hold seemed to reflect the strength of Hide's character as he guided him almost effortlessly through the crowd, undeterred by the occasional bump. Positioned directly in front of Kaneki, he carved a path for them, and Kaneki felt the rest of the world falling away around them, until it felt they were the only two people walking on the street.

 

And just like that, they were stopped in front of a small shop, tucked away from the worst of the crowd.

 

"I know it isn't Anteiku, but it's nice to mix things up once in a while, right?" Hide was grinning at him again, that same easy and carefree smile that hid an endless amount of perception and a depth of understanding that should have been more terrifying to Kaneki than a faceless mob.

 

And yet, Hide hadn't let go of his hand yet, and something light and airy bubbled up through his chest.

 

"I don't mind trying a new place." Kaneki didn't let go of Hide's hand, either.

 

They walked into the cafe like that, hand in hand, neither mentioning it nor making a move to separate. If the woman manning the register noticed, she didn't show it, and took their orders with obvious disinterest.

 

Despite how busy the streets outside were, there was an empty two person table off to the side, tucked away from the door. They took their seats, and only then released one another. Kaneki looked briefly down at his hand, the air against his palm an unsatisfying replacement for the weight and warmth of Hide. To think that Hide's presence had been enough to ease that impending sense of being crushed, suffocated, obliterated by the crowd. Sure, a bit of residual buzzing ran along his nerves, creating a mildly sour sensation in his stomach, but compared to before he was practically calm.

 

Was it okay to rely on Hide like this?

 

"I've been trying black coffee lately," Hide's voice reeled in his attention, and he tucked his hand in his lap with a little color coming to his cheeks.

 

"Really? I thought you preferred cappuccinos."

 

"You made me curious! You suddenly switched like that, so I wondered if you'd secretly discovered something amazing. I didn't want to be left in the dark!" Hide talked light-heartedly, but the topic felt like it was straying a little too close to something else. Kaneki glanced towards the woman at the counter brewing their coffees.

 

"It's nothing as deep as that, you know..."

 

"Yeah, I wondered if you were just trying to look cool, too." There was a teasing tone to Hide's voice that made Kaneki look back to him, and he couldn't resist rolling his eyes a little.

 

"Since when have I given you the impression that I care about looking cool?" But, despite himself, he was smiling a little bit.

 

"Well, you started wearing that eye patch too. Seemed like you were trying to act all mysterious or something, maybe to help you pick up more chicks." Hide shrugged. "You can't fool me though."

 

"Oh?"

 

"Nope! You're still the same ol' Kaneki as ever."

 

The strange tension that had been building within him suddenly unraveled, and he had to hide his eyes again. The connotations of Hide's words...it was always a little scary how well they seemed to apply in multiple ways, as if they were having a conversation at multiple levels.

 

"Are you saying I'm not cool and mysterious?" He fiddled with the paper wrapping his book, still glancing off to the side. Kaneki worried a little...about what Hide might be able to read from his eyes if he looked right at him.

 

"Mysterious, nah. But I think you're a little bit cool." Hide didn't sound like he was joking -- still teasing, yes, but not insincere. Kaneki snorted a little. As if anyone could think he was cool after that display on their way over.

 

"I can't tell if I should take that as a compliment or an insult." Kaneki joked back.

 

Whatever response Hide might have had was interrupted by the appearance of their coffees. Two cups of black coffee were set between them, but as quickly as the woman had come over to drop them off, she was gone again.

 

"Makes me miss Touka-chan," Hide sighed wistfully as he glanced at her retreating back. But in an instant, his attention was back to Kaneki. "Guess the true test of this place's mettle will be the coffee. Let's dig in!" Their prior conversation seemingly all but forgotten, Hide attacked his mug with gusto, only to jerk back in a rather comical, overdramatic display. "Hot, hot--!"

 

Kaneki couldn't hold back a bit of laughter despite himself, and covered his mouth with a hand.

 

"Hide, are you okay?" He managed between muffled giggles.

 

"Kaneki, you sadist!" Hide whined as he fanned his tongue. "I'm in agony over here, and you're laughing!"

 

"Sorry, sorry...is it really that bad?"

 

"It's awful. I'll probably never taste anything again. Touka-chan's coffee never wounded me so gravely." He pouted down at the mug, as if it had personally intended to do him harm from the very beginning.

 

"Probably because she knows you're going to try and gulp it like that..." Kaneki shook his head, but his expression was soft with affection. "Let me see?"

 

As he leaned forward across the table, Kaneki gestured for Hide to show him, and Hide obliged without hesitation. The sight was still quite comical; Hide was trying to pout even with his tongue extended, and Kaneki struggled to keep his amusement better contained this time.

 

"It doesn't look too bad...I think you're exaggerating." Kaneki sat back and finally picked up his own coffee.

 

"How cruel...do you really think I'd exaggerate something serious like this?" Hide shook his head in disappointment. "I expected better from you, Kaneki!"

 

"Either way, there's not much you can do but wait for it to get better, right?" Taking a sip, he fully expected a witty retort. When one didn't come, he paused, mug still at his lips, and blinked at Hide.

 

Kaneki was met with large eyes, and an even deeper pout. Clearing his throat, he slowly lowered his mug back down...and yet no explanation was offered up. The silence dragged on a bit longer.

 

"...What?"

 

That only served to make Hide intensify his gaze, and Kaneki shifted awkwardly. As Hide continued to refuse to speak up, Kaneki was forced to consider what the stare could possibly mean. The realization really didn't take that long to settle in, and he flushed when it did.

 

"Hide..."

 

"I'm wounded, Kaneki!" The exclamation confirmed Kaneki's suspicions, and he only turned a more noticeable shade of pink.

 

"Not here..."

 

Despite the negative connotations of his words, Hide seemed to perk up instantly, and leaned forward with interest.

 

"So at home is fine?" He was like an excited child, and Kaneki found it endearing, even as his insides twisted. Was it nerves? Was it excitement? A combination of the two? The line that separated them was so fine he could hardly tell the difference.

 

Words caught in his throat, as they tended to do when he experienced any aforementioned combination, and he traced the curves of his mug with a finger. It took him a moment to be able to shyly raise his gaze back to Hide, who seemed to be waiting with bated breath. Despite all that apparent confidence and strength...could it be possible that even Hide got a bit nervous? That the same Hide who had led them unflinchingly through the crowd with a firm grip around Kaneki's hand could feel such an unsteady sort of anticipation? Could it really be that as perceptive as Hide was, there were still things about Kaneki that he was unsure of?

 

Maybe he had simply been projecting his fears and insecurities on Hide from the beginning. Kaneki felt a sense of control over his situation that he had long though he'd lost altogether, and he helped to calm the fluttery sensation in his chest -- a little bit, at least. Enough that he could find the strength to put Hide out of his misery.

 

"...At home is fine." It was soft, shy, but unwavering. This time he didn't look away, either, his resolve based on a foundation of trust between them. And the response he got was immensely worth it.

 

The usual perky and bright Hide was flushing darker than Kaneki now, enough that the pale freckles dusting his cheeks stood out. It went all the way to the tips of his ears, and he didn't seem to know what to do with himself. Hide fidgeted in his seat, for once at an apparent loss of words himself, as if he hadn't expected his own reaction to be so intense. It was such a rare treat to see a side of Hide that Kaneki doubted many others had ever seen, he felt at once that it had been worth it to brave the crowd for this. In fact, he thought he might do anything just to be able to have moments like this with Hide.

 

"Look forward to it, okay?" Kaneki gently prompted when the silence stretched on. Hide spluttered a bit, then grabbed his coffee and took a rather impressive gulp. If he burnt himself again, he didn't seem to notice.

 

"Please take good care of me!" Hide stammered, adding a sloppy salute as he did. It was so ridiculous that Kaneki felt himself succumb to helpless laughter again...and after a moment, Hide joined in too.

 

After their laughter subsided, they were able to segue into normal conversation again, but a tension still remained between them. The anticipation of a promise they'd made lingered beneath quick glances and the anxious energy that had them shifting their posture, folding and refolding arms as they leaned on the table. There was an element of distraction in their responses, as if they playful joking was a form of autopilot they engaged in while their minds digested the implications of their more serious exchange. And yet they didn't rush to finish their coffee and head out, as if both were downplaying their eagerness, or as if they wanted to draw out the anticipation a while longer.

 

As time passed, the bustle outside dwindled, as did the coffee in their mugs, until streetlights flickered on and most of the other patrons had left for the evening. It hadn't been the busiest shop to begin with, but now it felt truly empty.

 

"Are you ready to go?" There was a little hesitation in the words as Kaneki spoke, painted by the weight of what leaving implied. Hide all but jumped to his feet, nearly throwing his chair back in the process.

 

"Yup!" Then he paused, sheepish. "What about you?"

 

"Yeah, let's head out." It was another amusing display, but for the sake of Hide's pride he managed to keep himself from letting out more than a hint of a smile.

 

They left together, the woman calling out her thanks from behind the counter, and stood for a moment in front of the shop. There were still people wandering around, but compared to earlier the streets were nearly deserted. The air was a bit cool on Kaneki's cheeks, and he took a moment to pull several deep breaths into his lungs. Being able to spend time with Hide like this...it really did make him feel as if nothing had changed. He still struggled with crowds, still got embarrassed, Hide still noticed and helped him...

 

...was it okay to stay like this forever?

 

Kaneki glanced over at Hide, who was also looking out at the streets, seemingly lost in his own thoughts. Gently, as more of a request than a demand, Kaneki shifted his book into one arm and used his free hand to brush his fingers against Hide's. Hide jerked his gaze down to find the source of the sensation, and softened when he realized it was Kaneki. This time they laced their fingers together, and suddenly the pressure of Hide's palm against his own seemed to chase away the subtle evening chill from the air. Kaneki couldn't hold back another smile, and then they were walking.

 

The silence that settled between them was comfortable, not born from an uncomfortable lack of things to discuss, rather a lack of need to discuss. Energy still buzzed between them, but it wasn't unpleasant. It made Kaneki feel a little giddy, actually, and again he was left wondering if it was really okay for them to walk together like this.

 

Before he knew it, they had walked the whole way back to his place, and were standing in front of his door. They hadn't released one another, and neither made an immediate move to say anything.

 

"...Does it still hurt?" Kaneki asked softly after a pause. Hide rubbed the back of his head and gave a little laugh.

 

"Uh...it really wasn't that bad. I just wanted an excuse..." He cleared his throat and glanced away, but Kaneki kept staring at him. Somehow, he needed to hear the end of that sentence, and eventually his intensity seemed to convey that to Hide. "...to kiss you."

 

Silence fell between them again, both of them flustered for their own reasons, but their hands remained locked together.

 

"Why?"

 

The question seemed to catch Hide a bit off guard, and he scratched at his cheek in embarrassment. "Kaneki, you can't just ask a guy why he wants to kiss someone! I mean, it's kind of self explanatory, right?" And yet, he continued. "...You looked so lonely in that crowd. I didn't really know what to do...but more than anything, I wanted to remind you that I'm here, too." He looked away, even as Kaneki's gaze followed him in surprise. He'd figured that he looked pretty pathetic when getting lost among all the people, but lonely hadn't been a descriptor he'd really imagined Hide using.

 

Kaneki finally moved to open the door, and used his grip on Hide's hand to pull him in after. Once inside together, he slowly closed the space between them, giving Hide ample opportunity to move away; he didn't. Their lips connected, soft and chaste and fleeting, and as Kaneki pulled back Hide's hand squeezed around his.

 

"Better?"

 

"Mm?" Hide sounded a bit dazed.

 

"Did that make your tongue feel better?"

 

Realization hit Hide, and a playful edge was quick to follow. He slid his free arm around Kaneki's waist and brought his pout back out at full power. Their noses brushed, and Kaneki's heart threatened to jump right up into his throat.

 

"Kisses only work if they're applied directly to the wounded area, don't'cha know?"

 

"I think you're just being greedy now, Hide."

 

"I can't help it when it's you! Please, Kaneki? It really hurts!" There was something about the pleading quality to Hide's voice that made him weak...although the lingering feeling of warmth on his lips, the closeness between them, the way that Hide's thumb rubbed circles over his own...all certainly didn't help. With a soft, fond sigh, Kaneki gave in.

 

"I'm not putting on a nurse outfit for you, though." He warned teasingly -- and almost immediately regretted it when Hide's eyes lit up with interest.

 

"A nurse--?"

 

Trying to cut that thought off before it could fully form, Kaneki kissed him again, but wasn't so quick to pull away this time. Hide was more than happy to let himself be distracted, and tugged Kaneki closer as he pressed back against him. It started soft, lips pliant, supple, fitting perfectly against one another. They moved slowly, caresses as sweet as Hide's fingers against his hand, but it was still enough to build a tingling heat within Kaneki.

 

Although it was not rushed, Hide was obviously eager, and took the lead in the kiss to slowly ramp up the intensity. A little more firm, a little more fervent, his head tilting slightly to one side to let him in closer. One of them sighed through their nose, although Kaneki wasn't sure which of them it was. He leaned his body against Hide's, his book sandwiched between them and mostly forgotten. His focus was on the way Hide's lips kneaded against his own, the warm, familiar smell of Hide wrapping around his senses, the soft noises of slick skin against skin. It made him feel light-headed and hot, and he pulled back briefly to catch his breath.

 

Hide let him, but a moment later was gently requesting to continue, ghosting his lips over Kaneki's. Unable to resist the sweetness of the light touch, Kaneki let himself be drawn back in, their lips moving together again with a greater sense of urgency. And yet it was still with an air of shyness that Hide parted his lips against Kaneki's.

 

That was the extent of it, he didn't launch a hot and heavy attack to pry his way into Kaneki's mouth; in fact, he did not even so much as touch Kaneki's lips with his tongue. It was more of an invitation than anything else...an invitation that had Kaneki's heart thundering in his ears. He was slow to accept, taking his time parting his own lips into the kiss, and allowing them to explore the way that felt. Hide encouraged with enthusiasm, and didn't attempt to push him to go any faster. Even this felt nice, anyway...a pleasant tingling pressure against his mouth, a sensation that followed the curve of his spine and pooled warmth in his stomach.

 

This alone was dangerous...it was easy to get lost in the sensation. It was easy to get lost in the taste, the softness of Hide's lips, the willingness of his open mouth. Kaneki ached with an odd frustration stemmed from a multitude of things he didn't have the capacity to articulate, and tried to drown it out by tracing the lines of Hide's lips with his tongue. They parted, inviting him in without hesitation, and he gently nudged his way inside with curious little movements. The ridges of Hide's teeth were so cute and rounded against his tongue, smooth and blunt. Kaneki's feelings of endearment welled up all at once, and embarrassingly enough he found himself giggling into Hide's mouth.

 

When he couldn't seem to get himself under control he pulled back to laugh breathlessly.

 

"What? Do I taste funny? Did you find something in my teeth?" Hide was obviously confused, but it seemed Kaneki's laughter was contagious, because he was starting to snicker a little too. Kaneki shook his head, but couldn't yet bring himself to speak. Hide released his waist in favor of bringing his hand up to brush the backs of his fingers over Kaneki's cheek, still holding his hand and maintaining their closeness -- even if it meant letting Kaneki laugh in his face.

 

"Did you think of a dirty joke?"

 

Again, Kaneki could only shake his head, but began to calm down a little, enough that they could bump their noses together without too much discomfort.

 

"Sorry..." he murmured, still catching his breath.

 

"You don't have to apologize."

 

Kaneki leaned in to kiss him again, deeply and with parted lips, but kept his tongue to himself for now. When he pulled back again, there was a pleasant ache that lingered behind.

 

"That should be enough now, right?" He teased gently as they rested their foreheads together. Hide gave a long, faux-suffering sigh and shut his eyes for a moment.

 

"I mean, I could still go for some more..." Hide cracked one eye open to peek at Kaneki.

 

With an affectionate eye roll, Kaneki gave him another, softer kiss. They parted slowly, Hide licking his lips.

 

"Okay, that should last me for an hour or so." Grinning, Hide gave Kaneki a little squeeze of a hug, and allowed him to move away.

 

"Hopefully longer than that...you need to go home at some point, you know." Kaneki kicked off his shoes so he could walk further into his home and set his book down on the table. His heart was still pounding, his body still throbbing, but he worried what other embarrassing or otherwise awful things might happen if they continued for too long. "Do you--?"

 

A thud cut him off mid-question, and he jerked around in shock to see Hide laying sprawled across the floor, holding his knee.

 

"Hide!" Concerned, he moved to Hide's side to inspect him, a million terrible possibilities running through his thoughts.

 

"I tripped..." Hide groaned out his explanation, wincing as he rubbed his knee. "I think it's broken. In fact, I'm probably dying..."

 

It was a little obvious now that Hide was exaggerating, based on the tone of his voice, which served to placate him some, but Kaneki still prodded gently at his knee in concern. "Do you need some ice? I have painkillers, too..."

 

"No, no...it's okay..." Hide turned a bit so he was laying on his back and looking up at Kaneki. Despite his supposed pain, there was a glint of something in his eyes again, something that made Kaneki wary. "But if you were to wear a nurse outfit--"

 

In that instant, Kaneki was no longer concerned about Hide being hurt.

 

"Hide, go home."


End file.
